Multibagger

One night, a drunk comes stumbling into a bar and says to the bartender: "Drinks for all on me including you, bartender. " So the bartender follows the mans orders and says: "That will be $36.50 please. " The drunk says he has no money so the bartender slaps him around and throws him out. The next night the same drunk comes in again and orders a drink for everyone in the bar including the bartender. Again the bartender follows instructions and again the drunk says he has no money. So the bartender slaps him around and throws him out. On the third night he comes in, the drunk orders drinks for all except the bartender. "What, no drink for me? " replies the bartender. "Oh, no. You get violent when you drink. "
A man goes to the doctor  and says, "Doc, you have to help me!"

The doctor asks, "What's your problem?"

The guy says, "Every morning I wake up with my 'morning flagpole'...give the wife a quick one, and then go to work. 
On the way to work, I carpool with the next door neighbor's wife who gives me a blow job during the ride to work. 
Once I get there, I do some work and then at morning tea time, i go into the photocopy room and crank one out with one of the young office girls. 
At lunch, I take my secretary out to a hotel and give her a good boning. 
For afternoon tea, I give the boss's wife a good servicing. 

Then, I go home and slip the maid a few inches.

Then at night, I give the wife another screw..." 


"So...????" asked the doctor. "What's your problem???"

The guy says, "Well, it hurts when I masturbate!"
A father watched his young daughter playing in the garden. He smiled as he reflected on how sweet and pure his little girl was. Tears formed in his eyes as he thought about her seeing the wonders of nature through such innocent eyes. Suddenly she just stopped and stared at the ground. He went over to her to see what work of God had captured her attention. He noticed she was looking at two spiders mating. Daddy, what are those two spiders doing?" she asked "They're mating," her father replied. "What do you call the spider on top?" she asked. "That's a Daddy Longlegs," her father answered. "So, the other one is a Mommy Longlegs?" the little girl asked. As his heart soared with the joy of such a cute and innocent question he replied "No dear. Both of them are Daddy Longlegs." The little girl, looking a little puzzled, thought for a moment then took her foot and stomped them flat and said, "Well, we're not having any of that gay shit in our garden."
Simplicity of Osho
A man to Osho: do U
know what boys & girls
R Doing in Ur Ashram?
Osho: Mere ko kya?
Man: Lekin ye to Aapka
Ashram hai.
Osho: Fir Tere ko kya?
Simplicity of Osho
A man to Osho: do U
know what boys & girls
R Doing in Ur Ashram?
Osho: Mere ko kya?
Man: Lekin ye to Aapka
Ashram hai.
Osho: Fir Tere ko kya?
:):xDaaru pee ke full tight sardarji raat ko achaanak neend me rone lagaa.
"Mera....Kho Gaya ?
Mera.Kho Gaya ?"
Wife:- "chup chap so Jao,
Aur Meri chaddi Me se Hath nikalo."
:D:p