Chutia

*चूतिया* शब्द की उत्पत्ति...

एक पुरुष को एक दुर्लभ बीमारी थी 

जिसका डाक्टरों के पास कोई इलाज नहीं था । 

लेकिन 

एक हक़ीम ने बताया की अगर कोई स्त्री एक महीने तक उसे अपना दूध पिलाये तो शर्तिया वो ठीक हो जायेगा ।

ये बात जब बिरादरी को पता चली तो उसकी जान बचाने की खातिर उन्होंने मोहल्ले की एक ऐसी महिला को उस पुण्य के काम के लिये तैयार किया !

युवक दूध पीने महिला के घर पहुँच गया ।

पांच मिनट दूध पीने का सिलसिला लगातार चला तो एकाएक महिला 

*उत्तेजित भाव से कान में फुसफुसाई :*

*कुछ और चाहिये क्या...?*

बेचारा शरीफ था भावनाओ को समझा नहीं

और बोला:

*एकाध बिस्कुट हो तो दे दो...* 

*और इस तरह "चूतिया" शब्द का आविष्कार हुआ ।*

🤫😝😉🤦🏻‍♂️😜😱😳🥺🙈😯🤩..

Chinese

I recently met a Chinese man and his name was Kanna Swami.  

I asked him: "How did you ever get a name like that being a Chinese? 

He said: "Many, many years ago when I first went to USA. I was standing in line at the Political Asylums Immigration Counter. 

The man in front of me was a Sri Lankan Tamil refugee. The white lady at the counter looked at him and asked "What is your name?" He replied "Kannaswami. 

Then she looked at me and asked "What's your name?" 

I said, "Sem Ting"🥺

😆😆😅😅😂😂

Bund

*Patient:*  दो इंजेक्शन क्यों लगाये ?

*Punjabi compounder:*  ऐसा है कि B12 के इंजेक्शन ख़तम हो गये थे, इसलिए B6 के दो लगाये

*Patient:* चंगा है B6 मिल गए, B1 दे इंजेक्शन होंदे ते, तुसी ते बुंड पाड़ देनी सी

😂😂😂

Shashi special

“Exotic crispy puffed wild rice from the amazon rainforest, drizzled with an aromatic salsa-verde of Mauritanian desert cilantro & the chefs secret micro-greens sourced from our exclusive greenhouses in the antarctic, bathed in a luscious salsa-rosso of Botswanaiandates & exceedingly rare Burundian Bujumbura chillies known for fruiting once in twelve years, seasoned with a sauce of sweet Japanese volcanic-soil grown tamarind & malabar organic raw sugar; tossed in a bronze vessel with macedoines of Mongolian winter shallots & Andean heritage potatoes and riotously festooned with a cacophony of Andalusian chickpea flavoured crunchies “bugea” & “papdy” cooked  “a la Marwaraise.

*Commonly known as Bhel puri.*

*Got this recipe from Shashi Tharoor*🤓🤓

We have kept it

Hubby

*Husband* :  तू मायके जाकर भी 

मुझसे क्यु झगड़ रही हो..

*Wife🙋 : Work from home*😂😂

😀😀😀😀

J&J

*Centre is talking to Johnson and Johnsons for single dose  vaccination* 

Question raised by Rahul Gandhi is when it is only one dose why not talk to one Johnson only. Talking to more than one Johnson is to make bribe money and inflate cost.

Mamata has further objected why not talk to John only  and why his son has to be involved in deal.

*Now Centre Will go for Moderna to avoid arguments.*

Maa ka bhosda

Shashi Tharoor to Rakhi Sawant:  Bestow me with the delectation of your occurrence in my mansion.

Rakhi: माफ करना भैया।

इतनी क्लिष्ट अंग्रेज़ी नही आती।

सीधी साधी हिंदी में बोलो।

Shashi Tharoor: आओ कभी मेरी हवेली पर।

Rakhi: आप की जन्मदात्री की विस्तृत योनी।

Tharoor- Sorry, I don’t understand pure & tough Hindi. Please use simplest words. 

Rakhi: तेरी माँ का भोंसडा !😅😄