Joke

A guy goes into the confessional box after years being away from the Church. He pulls aside the curtain, enters and sits himself down.

There's a fully equipped bar with crystal glasses, the best vestry wine, Guinness on tap, cigars and liqueur chocolates nearby, and on the wall a fine photographic display of buxom ladies who appear to have mislaid their garments.
He hears a priest come in: "Father, forgive me for it's been a very long time since I've been to confession and I must admit that the confessional box is much more inviting than it used to be."




The priest replies, "Get out you idiot. You're on my side!"=D
Ek baar class main inspection hoti hain..

Headmaster sahib aate hain....... Sawaal karna shuru!

Headmaster: "Bachoo Hamari body ka sabse naram part konsa hain"?

Jab koi jawab nahin deta to master Tinku ki taraf ishara karte hue Headmaster: "Tinku tum is ka jawab do"!!
Tinku: "Master ji hamari body ka sabse naram part hain GAAND, kyon ki, agar hame thand (cold) lag gaye hum kehte hain 'GAAND Phat gayi', Garmi lag jaya hum kehte hain 'GAAND phat gayi', thoda chalna pad jaye'GAAND phat gayi', Rona aa jaye 'GAAND phat gayi', Homework karana ho'GAAND phat gayi'

Headmaster ko gussa to aata hain lekin tinku ka jawaab bhi sahi hain to woh kuch nahin kehta.. phir sawaal karta hain

Headmaster: "acha aab ye batao ke, Ladki ki jab shaadi ho jaati hain to woh Doli ke time roti kyon hain"

Phir koi jawaab nahin deta......master phir Tinku ko jawaab dene ko kehta hain.

Tinku: " Master ji aap itne bade master, gyani or Samajhdar AGAR AAPKI KOI 400KM GHAR SE DOOOOOR LE JAA KAR GAAND MAREGA TO AAPKO RONA NAHIN AAYEGA?

Master ji ko phir bhut gussa aata hain lekin tinku ka jawaab bhi thik hain...isleye woh use kuch nahin kehta. Master phir sawaal karata hain

Headmaster: " Acha bachoo agar main aapko tisri aankh lagane ki shakti doon to tum kahan lagwaoge"

Koi bacha kehta hain sir pe, koi kehta hain mooh main, koi kehta hain pet main. koi kehta hain kaan pe.....

Master ko koi bhi answer acha nahin lagta hain to woh Tinku ko phir khada karta hain

Tinku: " Master ji main tisri aankh haat ki badi wali ungli main lagawaoonga"

Headmaster: " Kyon Tinku"

Tinku: " Main usko aapki GAAND main dalke ye dekhoonga ke aisa kaun sa kida aapki GAAND main Bhatak raha hain jo Salla har Sawaal mujhi se pooch raha hai..=D =))
Haryanvi calls Customer Care: "Sir maari bhains ne mara sim kha lia or bhag gi."

Cust. Care : To mai kya karu?

Haryanvi: Re karna ke hai, tu manne yo bata ke roaming to na laagri..!!=))